Stage 5

Acceptance. 

At peace. 

I seemed to have breezed through the last three stages faster than I accepted. Negotiation in the shower, depression all through the stages, and now acceptance. 

I have accepted the situation for what it is or isn't. 

I won't say I am happy, just at peace. It is what it is and I can't change it. I don't have to like it, just understand that I can't change it. Isn't that what stage 5 entails?? 

I think Ace let up because it's a new place, and I turned out to be more fragile than anticipated. I would have shattered if the cycle ran according to the normal time course. Shattering now would ruin more than a simple 'I'm sorry' will fix. 

I would still need the fake smiles and laughter. I would still need to keep up with appearances. But the difference now is I know I would be okay. I know I would return to my proverbial norm. 

And in this knowledge, I am at peace. 

Curious. I still never cried. 

xo