Forbidden Contract

Last night,
At the cross road,
Where they say man meets the devil,
I sold my soul.
Not to the owner of the road,
As one would have expected,
Or to his helper,
As would have been the case.
But to a certain 'He'.

I still remember how the cold wind felt,
As it moved calmly yet seductively around me.
I remember the shape of the moon,
As it warmed me on that starry night.
Full moon?
So it seemed, as I signed with its light on the sand.

Last night,
At the place called the "Devil's Gate",
I sold my soul.
It was not to the devil as my other longed for,
But some may say my buyer was worse.
Yet
Whispering in my ears through the night,
Drowning me,
Making me sink deeper and deeper,
With each intoxicating breath I took,
It was hard to wake up from this newly found bliss.

Last night I defiled my Father and went to the Devil's Way,
Last night I defiled the devil and did business with another at his wake.
Surely the list of plagues that await me have become longer!
Surely my punishments are yet to be compiled!
But as I listened to the sound of his voice,
Gazing,
I was entrapped in the world in his eyes.
Surely if there was a pleasure known to man,
This would be it would it not?
Surely it was worth dieing for...
Was it not this?

Last night,
At the cross-road,
At the place where they say man meets the devil,
The place called the 'Devil's Gate',
I sold my soul to no other than 'He'.
And I thought "Hell be damned!" As I walked away with him,
Arm in arm,
The contract signed,
In blood and in mind,
There was no turning back.

The pain I feel

So I sprained my ankle today, and it hurts lyk hell! But then I noticed one thing, I actually prefer this pain to the other. I have never been a masochist, and frankly I dont intend to become one now! I certainly do not derive any pleasure from pain, but I actually see what it means to get relief from a lesser pain. Like that episode in 'House" when House broke his pinky to divert his pain sensors attention to the new and less painful feeling he felt, as opposed to the one in his leg.

But then I dont know how long I can hold up though. With the former, I could sleep and for that time forget about it and wake up with some minute of peace and solitude. But with this one, a slight movement hurts the most. And no, I still cannot shed a tear. So right now I wonder if this really is better? I cant cry it out, so I bear it...though I am one breath short of screaming. Wish I had some Valium or something strong to knock me out and make this pain go.

It hurts.