Erroneous Games...

There is something I did which I cant say out loud,
That which I did weighs my heart so heavily, I almost want to yell it out.
But each time I try to think it through in my head,
It sounds even crazier thinking about bringing it up.

There is something I did I cant say out loud,
And for the first time in history, I cant write it too.
Yet each time I see those close to me, I try to tell them what I did,
But then I know those words would not make the load any lighter. Just change it.

Ever done something you know would change the way people think of you drastically?
Ever done something you want to keep buried between you, the devil and God?
Ever done something for which you block out the details of, as life is a little easier?
Ever done something you do regret but then not for the right reasons, which makes you question your sanity?

There is something I did that I can't say out loud,
There is something I did that mirrors another act of its own,
There is something I did that I fear might be starting a trend!
And yet while I fear this, somewhere at the back of my mind, I think to myself...
"Oh what a tale it would be if I do tell it,
Oh what a look the would have if they do hear it,
Oh what a game it would be if I do play it...this time till the end..."

Funny thing

So I could not watch the sun rise this morning because Carbondale has too many freaking street lights on at dark, (don't ask why I was up to watch the sun rise...too long a story to tell here), and it got me thinking about the fact that Nigeria and America have a lot of differences. Well I've been thinking about that a lot so whatever.
First off, there is the fact that while in Nigeria the host stands outside to watch the visitor drive off, you know as a sign of wishing them farewell, but here in the state, the guest watches the host walk back into his house. I mean they sit in the car while you walk back in before they drive off, to make sure you get in safe and don't get mugged on the way. That's pretty ironic to me cause back home, its the guy in the car who is in danger of getting mugged at night.
Then of course there is the reason I started this piece, the fact that agberos have stolen just about all the bulbs in the street lights in Nigeria you HAVE to see the sun rise when its dawn. I mean NEPA (well technically its PHCN but NEPA soundsa better) never turns on the electricity anyway, so we generally rely on the natural sources of light, being the sun and the moon. I think it is safe to say that there you damn well have to know when the night is over and the sun starts rising...because then you don't need ot keep your candles on anymore.
Americans have fun. It may be hiking, trick or treat at haloween, or just simply get on a bike and go racing, you know doing something fast. Nigerians sit and watch Americans have fun - in the form of TVs of course...lol
But all in all, with all the differences, I cant pick a side. So I choose earth as my home, and everything in it...all her ironies as well...

Sprung

I wish you would laugh with me again,
I wish you would tell jokes with me again,
I wish you would talk to me again,
I wish you would call me babes again,
I wish you would call me again.

I wish I could roll my eyes at the phone and call you 'sir' again,
I wish I could listen to you talk logic and give me 'fatherly advice' again,
I wish you would try to answer me when I accidentally ask you a 'brain teaser' again,
I wish I could ask you a question again,
I wish I could try to start a conversation with you again,
I wish you would call me again.

I wish I could call you a jerk again,
I wish I could fight with you again,
I wish I could get a conversation 'ender' again,
I wish I could ask you a question again,
I wish I could talk to you again,
I wish you would call me again