Been a little while, but here is the next part for our lovely book summary. Enjoy, and as always, some of these sentences are direct quotes.
Chapter 5: Love Is (Part 3: Paul's list B)
(Not) Self-seeking.
* Again, love puts the needs of others first.
* Deciding to be 'not self-seeking' is the fastest way to find out if your love interest is self-seeking.
* You give give + they take take only = You run run.
Provocative: "Not easily angered"
* Love doesn't get stirred up, wound up, set off, ticked off. No short fuse.
* Love = No reactions; only responses.
* The other party may push your buttons, but ultimately, they are YOUR buttons. You choose how you respond.
* If someone's words stirs something inside of you, it's inside you. i.e. It's a you problem. Own it, deal with it. Same should go for love interest.
Record Keepers
* "Love keeps no record of wrongs." (Stereotypically speaking, this is a hard task for women, speaking as one lol).
* Record keepers are right, which is the challenge. That is, the other party did do the things in the record. However, re-telling the past hurts the relationship in this case.
* Behavioural patterns do need to be examined, yes, but not by a significant other. And by request only.
* Practice forgiving and pretending to forget with regards to recounting past sins in a present issue. Don't hold the past over the other party.
* You don't want to be reminded of your failures. Neither does anyone else.
Believing is Seeing.
"Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres" (1 Corinthians 13:6-7).
* Meaning - love chooses to see the best and believe the best while choosing to overlook the rest.
* Love is hopeful. Does not search for bad behaviour. Instead, it looks for and celebrates good behaviours.
* Record keep the good behaviours, feel free to bring those up and credit the other party.
* Paul may suggest that true love chooses to be blind (to failures); focuses on success.
* When a partner doesn't come through on something, they create a gap. It is up to you to decide to fill the gap with trust or suspicion: believe the best or suspect the worst.
* Love perseveres: it continues to love even when there are reasons not to.
* Trust builds trust. When both parties choose trust over suspicion, the relationship moves in a healthier direction.
Un-Natural
* None of love's traits come naturally. Or rather, none of the trays are sustained naturally (constantly there, despite the situation).
* Romance comes naturally. But to sustain it, you need patience, kindness, humility and a short memory (characteristics of love).
Now we have learned what love is, next stop....
Chapter 6: The Gentleman's Club (For the male readers).
....to be continued....
