Erroneous Games...

There is something I did which I cant say out loud,
That which I did weighs my heart so heavily, I almost want to yell it out.
But each time I try to think it through in my head,
It sounds even crazier thinking about bringing it up.

There is something I did I cant say out loud,
And for the first time in history, I cant write it too.
Yet each time I see those close to me, I try to tell them what I did,
But then I know those words would not make the load any lighter. Just change it.

Ever done something you know would change the way people think of you drastically?
Ever done something you want to keep buried between you, the devil and God?
Ever done something for which you block out the details of, as life is a little easier?
Ever done something you do regret but then not for the right reasons, which makes you question your sanity?

There is something I did that I can't say out loud,
There is something I did that mirrors another act of its own,
There is something I did that I fear might be starting a trend!
And yet while I fear this, somewhere at the back of my mind, I think to myself...
"Oh what a tale it would be if I do tell it,
Oh what a look the would have if they do hear it,
Oh what a game it would be if I do play it...this time till the end..."