These words of mine....

I am a loner, yet I am afraid to be alone,
I am adorned with a sense for adventure,
a restless spirit, yet I am terrified of the unknown.
I long to go places, I long to be someone, I long for something,
But the world seems to glide right past me, like the passing tide at sea,
Over me, under me, but not through me.

I believe that I am an investment,
and like every other one there is,
payments can come to an end.
I know in my head that that is not true,
but I cannot seem to wrap my mind or heart around the truth.

People think I try to fight for what I want,
Yes I do try to fight for what I want.
But sometimes, I run, because it's easier on my heart.
Maybe I stick physically, but I run internally.
What use is there staying when you soul has left the scene?

I thought I knew what it was I wanted,
No, I know what it is I want,
but I am scared to believe I can get it.
For the few things I have believed in came to an end,
Far too soon for me to even have possible fathom.

But its nice to know that somethings in me do not change.
Even though they are sad, they still do not change.
Doesn't that make me human in a sense?
I am tired, and I want to rest,
but rest eludes me, toys with me and mocks me.


I want to go, go and keep going,
but a destination eludes me, toys with me and mocks me.
I chose to sit and wait long ago,
but after centuries of waiting to no avail, can you blame me for my decision?
It's over now, nothing began, and at last, nothing has finally come to an end.
I quit.